It started off as a typical day. I had my morning coffee, did a browse of the web, turned on the TV while my wife got in the shower. We leave for work together most days, and this was just another day.
I turned to CNN, a few minutes after the first plane hit. There was no video at the time to confirm it was a 747. Reporters said they believed it was a small private aircraft. They were conjecturing it was human error. There was no indication of what was to happen next.
I stopped in the bathroom to tell Shell what was going on. She was gonna hurry out of the shower. I sat down and two seconds later, with the camera locked on the north tower, a huge fireball erupts from the second. The reporters mistakenly think the explosion is from the north tower. A new shot and perspective and now you can hear the cracks in reporters voices. Fear. Anger. The reality starting to set in. At first no one indicated what caused the second explosion. Some on air conjecturing takes place, and a slowed down replay makes it clear. There was a second plane.
I run to tell Shell, and she get’s out of the shower.
We don’t say much. Just holding on to one another. Looking at the live shots of people deciding to jump. Of the buildings falling. Of the hit on the Pentagon. The reports of other planes out there. Of fight 93. Wondering how many innocent lives were lost. Hearing stories of heroism. Making calls to friends and family. Saying prayers.
Here is a prayer I keep pinned next to my desk. Even if you don’t believe in God, it’s words make sense as a personal code of conduct. One I wish I could live up to better.
Lord, make me an instrument of Your Peace,
Where there is hatred, let me sow Love;
Where there is injury, Pardon;
Where there is doubt, Faith;
Where there is despair, Hope;
Where there is darkness, Light;
And Where there is sadness, Joy.
O Divine Master, grant that I may not So much seek to be consoled, as to Console;
To be understood as to Understand;
To be loved as to Love;
For it is in Giving that we recieve;
It is in Pardoning that we are pardoned;
It is in dying that we are born to eternal life.
Amen.
I saw real evil that day. Just a few showed how evil human beings can be. I thought evil like that only existed in history books. In the past. But here it was in my day and age.
I am one of the first people in my circle, to try to find root causes for why people do bad things in this world. My background reminds me that people are influenced by many things that drive them to make decisions that are sometimes wrong.
This – was – indefensible. It was unmistakable. It was evil. “Judge not” is a rule of mine. How could I not? I was conflicted. Confronted by something I did not believe in – evil – and simultaneously judging it. Fear, nausea, anger.
I think as the day wore on a more important realization came thru. A bigger one. A more powerful one. It took some time to sink in. That very same day I saw real heroes. Many of them. Uncountable numbers of them. People doing things that mattered. Fighting for life. Fighting for people other then themselves. People trying to do the right thing. The good thing. Heroes exist. They were already here.
Don’t come by here the rest of today. Infact, if you’re reading this today, I’m disappointed in you – there are better things to be doing with your life. Tell someone you love them. Go hug someone. Say thanks and pay respects. Remember. Go do them.