From my quote file: Calvin Coolidge (1872-1933):

Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination are omnipotent. The slogan press on has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.

Turns out there is some truth to this. Via Garret, comes a Philadelphia Inquirer story about a Penn researcher who says it isn’t I.Q., grades or talent that lead to success – “It’s good, old-fashioned stick-to-itiveness.”:

“It’s not like you could be stupid, but if you didn’t have the necessary drive and determination to overcome obstacles and set high standards for yourself, then you weren’t going to make it,” he says.

But Simonton thinks Duckworth’s grit studies are interesting on two fronts. She’s looking at contemporary achievers, rather than dead geniuses, and she’s developed a grit scale, which attempts to measure the determination they show.

Robert J. Sternberg, a Yale University psychology professor who directs the school’s Center for the Psychology of Abilities, Competencies and Expertise, believes that schools don’t emphasize nonintellectual qualities – like grit – enough. “There’s a really serious disconnect between the way we prepare kids for leadership positions in society, for life as an adult, and what you actually have to do to get there,” he says.

Not that parents always do the job either. Some try to protect their kids from failure or frustration. “In the course of your life, you encounter a lot of blows, some of them quite awful,” Sternberg says, “and if you don’t learn how to overcome those obstacles, you’re at a disadvantage.”

My personal story is a real world example. It’s one of the reasons why I believe no matter how lost some may think some are – there is always hope.

Don’t let anyone’s put downs or discouragement, your background or history, keep you from fighting for your dreams. It’s always about the fight.

I’m definitely ramping up to join the local folks who’ve shared their views on faith and politics. Not being an eloquent writer makes it difficult – it’s complicated to think about – let alone write about – but the conversation, I think, is important.

My head hurts, and my sniffles are even worst then they were yesterday. I thought I was over the hump. This cold is a pain in the ass. Now Richelle has it.

A little meditative thought, going over old lyrics of mine. Powerful stuff to face old writing. All sorts of things become clear upon reflection.

One thing, for example, that got me was how black and white the world once seemed. Was it that way for you long ago? Here’s a question to frame it for you: What is a friend?

I’ve been blessed with many in my life. One who is my wife. One who is my brother. One who may not be my brother by blood – but is my brother nevertheless. One a mentor. One practically a father. One my zen master. Three who called themselves my mom. Those I’ve worked with thru some hard times, and those who work to try and build something special with me, with little resources, and little personal gain.

And then there is the instance of the one I turned on for a break of trust. It still can shock me the depth of anger I felt at the perceived betrayal. Since then I’ve actually let a few people walk all over me, my response to that situation bothered me so. Richelle says I’m now too trusting. It’s a compliment… I think 🙂

Well according to dictionary.com a friend is:

1. A person whom one knows, likes, and trusts.
2. A person whom one knows; an acquaintance.
3. A person with whom one is allied in a struggle or cause; a comrade.
4. One who supports, sympathizes with, or patronizes a group, cause, or movement.
5. Friend A member of the Society of Friends; a Quaker.

If I recall correctly, as a kid your definition of a friend is very black and white: Someone you play with.

And as a teenager it gets a bit more complex – A soul you can trust. A heart that accepts you. A person you care for. A fist that will fight for you. Two feet that will stand beside you when things get hairy.

But as an adult we muddy our definition of the word friend. It becomes elastic to include acquaintances. People who we simply share interests but may not care for in the least.

Maybe this is a good thing. We grow tolerant. Our hearts less exclusive. Maybe its the acknowledgment that life is a whole lot easier if we lay down our walls and be cool with one another.

Maybe its an acknowledgment that we had it right when we were children – simply now a friend is someone you share a drink with and maybe a joke.

I’d like to believe that, but…

A part of me holds that teenager’s definition a little too dear – for example, it pisses me off how some throw around the word friend and then walk away the first time someone needs help.

That same part wants to revolt at how we market our 1,251 friends on My Space or look at our link ranks on Technorati… speaking of which… if you link to me.. are you my friend? If you don’t… what does that say?

Well, then again, sometimes a link is just a link. A comment is just a comment. And it’s expressions of reaching out that counts. One way, or another.

Back to my guitar and those old lyrics.