I sit here at my keyboard tonight, after cleaning out my closet, cleaning out items I have held onto for reasons I can’t recall: old magazines, pins, ticket stubs, pamphlets, phone numbers from I forget who, and even to manuals to programs long ago deleted.
It’s hard not to reflect at times like these. Holding something as simple as an old newspaper, memories can come back, some of which you don’t want to face.
It wasn’t so long ago I couldn’t have collected such minutia. I had to travel light. A trash bag filled with around two week’s worth of clothes was all I could really handle. How I got from there to here still seems unreal to me – even with all the hard work and struggle.
I’ve never shared publicly how I came to such a state. Shoot – I’ve never fully shared my struggles getting from there to here. I guess I don’t out of fear.
Which is sad really.
Here I am – someone who encourages communication – who is compelled to encourage it and build tools to enable it – and I don’t allow myself the same freedom.
Are you talking about how your blog is usually more impersonal & general in topic? Many blogs are. I struggle with expanding mine into new terrain all the time, as well. 🙂
Pretty much Marjo. I find it’s far easier for me to talk about my life thru song then thru posting it – yet a good blog speaks with a personal voice.
There is a lot of irony that I actively encourage others to speak out and keep my own trap shut 🙂
I don’t think that it’s ironic at all. Some people are just not comfortable sharing personal things online to people they do not know. Some people are not comfortable with tons of things, I think it’s more of a personal preference than some kind of blasphemous action on your part.
Encouraging others to speak out may just be a sign for you to see how others deal with writing more personally and for you to subconsciously see how they deal with it to help you out. I don’t think that it’s something you should force yourself to do, it won’t feel right.
Your ability to provide the tools for others to have a voice and share their stories has significantly changed me. PF has changed my outlook on a city that I already loved so much; I feel even more connected to it and PF is a big part of that. I’ve only been here for a year, but I’ve made so many new friends through it and I can’t thank you enough for the opportunity.
And I enjoyed your Wanamaker post so much. Baby steps…
Thanks Albert. Baby steps indeed 🙂